starbreather.

Desiring the despondency of the divine.
the truth is I've always felt thirsty, felt the integrity build up in excess then let it all evaporate like stars breathing vapors of phosphorescent illumination into the vast midst of a dark and desperate horizon. The day that doomed us all.. We learned to fall. but not how to catch ourselves...
staking out the heart of man to turn to dust hand in hand.
I came as dust I leave as dust. the earth shakes violent as the machines rust.
your dirty bath water is whats left of the filth. you leave clean content.
My feet are a dim crimson dense with each step I take. broken hour glasses mark my path as I sense no direction and time is always below me. I can breathe you in by the hour and exhale leaving a vigor and yet shallow exhale of absolute. the virtuous man that shook the hands, the hands of the fallen. I make my bed in whats left of a torn page ripped into ashes, ashes carried by a wind that the seabirds fear. the one that could take you across miles of sea effortlessly.. where you lose all but your sanity. because you never had any to begin with. broken bones and crooked teeth fill the walls. so you slept under a tree to hear the earth's heart beating stronger than it has since creation. Have we drowned? or is the water in my chest just oxygen with too much anticipation? lungs with no exasperation. just taking in all the life turning the ambiance to a dull black and white modern detatchment. you see that was our weakness all along... we've been expiring the moment we were given to this world. Given to our mother's arms, bright eyes already weary.
and you ask yourself why am I not infinite?
belligerent fool. our souls are bound for grace.
grace pardons..

Am I afraid to die? No, But I fear I will die before I actually live.
oh insides,
These are the tales of the tell tale heart.
the brain is such a contradiction.

sometimes always,
-J